When Little Bear was 6 weeks old she was virtually sleeping through the night. She'd fall asleep on her own after we laid her down, and she wouldn't wake-up for 8-9 hours. I was warned that babies change their sleep patterns many times during the first few years, so I wasn't all that surprised (though maybe I was a bit disappointed) when Little Bear suddenly started waking up several times each night at around 7 months.
I'll be honest: I like my sleep. I like my sleep A LOT. I've always been one of those 9-hour-a-night sleepers. My husband used to make fun of me because I used to say my favorite part of the day was pulling the covers up over me in the evening and putting my head down on the pillow (being a former Marine, K can go for many days on little to no sleep). While I still love cuddling down into my comforter in the evening, it's not quite the same anymore because instead of 9 hours of blissful rest to look forward to ... I know that I will now be up several times, and more often than not, I will wake-up feeling tired. My morning cup of coffee has never been more crucial (thank goodness K usually has a pot already brewed by the time I stumble downstairs).
I woke-up this morning absolutely exhausted and at my wit's end. On Friday Little Bear slept 7 hours without waking (the longest she's slept in months). Saturday she woke-up 3 times. Sunday 3 times. Last night 5 times. Her sleep/wake schedule is completely erratic with no pattern what-so-ever - despite having a set night-time routine and bedtime. Last night, as I sat up to flip sides for nursing for the 5th time, I kept going through all the things I've read about growing babies. Maybe it's her teeth? She started crawling last month ... I'd heard that this can mess with their sleep pattern. Is she too hot? Too cold? If she wouldn't try crawling around in the middle of the night and getting herself into weird sleeping positions, maybe she'd sleep better. Should I let her cry it out ... maybe after a few sleepless nights she'd start putting herself back to sleep. Then again, maybe not. My mind kept going over all the reasons Little Bear would be waking up over and over throughout the night. And I kept trying to come up with solutions ... including moving her crib into another room and letting her cry.
And then I reached out and got some feedback from friends. And I was reminded that: 1) this is normal for a 10 month old, and 2) there is no right answer or solution. And that's really all I needed. Reassurance from friends and a reminder that babies wake-up at night. And that when we decided to become parents, this was part of what I signed-up for. There is so much literature and advice out there telling us that "babies should be sleeping through the night" by such and such an age. Yet when I talk with parents, I've yet to meet one that had a baby consistently doing this. The norm seems to be quite the opposite in fact.
Reading a little history on sleep patterns of babies, I was again reminded that this notion that a young child should sleep through the night without needing mom to feed or comfort him came about only in the last 100 years or so. Up until this point it was simply assumed that mom was going to waking-up at night to feed and care for her little ones. Which is why co-sleeping has also been the norm until just recently. Having a child either in the same bed or within arm's reach made nightly feedings much easier on everyone.
So even though I am feeling quite sleep-deprived and a bit loopy ... I am (again) letting go of my expectations. Little Bear will continue coming to bed with me, I will continue flipping over so Little Bear can nurse when she needs to ... and I'll try and remember that this is all part of becoming a mother, and that someday, when Little Bear no longer needs me in the middle of the night, and is perfectly happy asleep in her own bed in her own bedroom ... I'll probably miss it.
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